In my work with families as well as in my studies, I have become more and more aware of how important it is to have an early diagnosis in cases of children with special needs. The earlier the diagnosis, the less stress for the parents. Not that special needs children don't have their own set of stresses, of course they do. But studies show that the younger the child is when diagnosed, the lower the stress level on the parents over time. I'll add my own input here: and the sooner your child can begin receiving the proper developmental care.
Getting diagnosed early is also a problem. I knew from the womb our son was driven by a motor. From birth he didn't sleep - he merely recharged. By age three I read up on ADHD and his behaviors met all criteria. But the doctors would not even assess him until he was six. Yes we had nearly six very judgmental, stressful years. Two months before his sixth birthday, I begged the doctor to do the assessment. He complied and his ADHD was now confirmed by proper channels which meant we now had ammo to use with school to get support vs. judgement.
We didn't get that much support, but at least they had some reason behind the animal noises and sudden pouncing. Medication helped him to "focus". We never told him he had ADHD because we didn't want him to feel labeled. We just told him the focus pills would help him be the boss of his brain and he could choose to focus on the tip of his finger or what the teacher was saying. After a few years (and falling asleep on the bus) he told us he didn't like the way he felt with his medicine and we stopped giving it to him. We coached him to remember he had the choice of what to focus on and he worked hard to focus on appropriate things. By middle school the animal noises were gone. People that met him then refused to believe our stories about the three-year-old running laps around the dinner table. We were some of the lucky ones. We got an accurate diagnosis and were able to work with it. We knew early on, but it wasn't confirmed until kindergarten. And through prayer and self-control, our son is now a strong, responsible adult. No one believes he ever had ADHD. That's fine with me - he is now an adult living out the life we dreamed for him to have.
I know families who get early diagnosis only to find out by middle school it wasn't the correct one. Or it wasn't as detailed as it needed to be. One child was thought to have ADHD doesn't. He was thought to be rebellious by refusing to do his work at school or at home. He insisted he understood but refused to do it or give a reason why no matter how many different ways he was asked by his teachers, parents, or therapists. The parents finally commenced a battery of testing that revealed completely different issues with brain ability and processing skills. Everything that has been done for him to date has been the wrong approach. Based upon this new information, a number of new teaching approaches and therapies will need to be put in place. My heart breaks for a child so misunderstood for so long. It isn't that he doesn't want to - he can't.
Sometimes it's easy to know a child has special needs based upon appearance or equipment they use, but more often the special need is invisible. And not every boy rolling on the floor under the table in Sunday School has ADHD. Sometimes, it's just a disobedient kid. Before you decide it's someone with poor parents, before you decide it's a defiant kid - stop. Spend some time understanding what is going on first.
Since the younger the child, the harder it can be to fully diagnose, I would get several opinions - especially if you do not see any progress after six months. It's going to be hard to figure out what to call a child on if they have a strong will and a learning disability. It will be essential you find out what they are capable of so you can reinforce that. And I wouldn't let your special needs child use that as an excuse.
To cheer you up, take a look at some short lists of celebrities who have become successful contributors in various fields - if not the world. Don't stay discouraged! There is hope for anyone who wants to try.
Famous people with autism: Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, Daryl Hannah, Andy Warhol, Lewis Carroll, Dan Ackroyd
Famous people with OCD: Justin Timberlake, Leonardo DiCaprio, Jessica Alba, Katy Perry, Howie Mandel, Cameron Diaz, David Beckham, Charlize Theron, Albert Einstein, Penelope Cruz, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Alec Baldwin, Michael Jackson, Rose McGowan, Harrison Ford, Donald Trump, Martin Scorsese, Howard Stern, Woody Allen,
Famous people with ADHD: Justin Timberlake, Will Smith, Michael Phelps, Jamie Oliver, Jim Carrey, Sir Richard Branson, Howie Mandel, Bill Gates, Eva Longoria, Joan Rivers, Steven Tyler (Aerosmith), Elvis Presley, Michael Jordan, Stevie Wonder, Jack Nicholson,
Famous people with dyslexia: Jay Leno, Whoopi Goldberg, Henry Winkler, Steven Spielberg, Selma Hayek, Mohammad Ali, Magic Johnson, Keira Knightly, Keanu Reeves, Charles Schwab (investor), Vince Vaughn, Tim Tebow, Anderson Cooper, Cher, Tommy Hilfiger, Daymond John, Barbara Corcoran, Ingvar Kamprad (IKEA founder), Paul Orfalea (Kinkos founder), Brian Grazer (director), Salma Hayek, Tom Cruise, Steve Jobs, Alyssa Milano, Anthony Hopkins, John Lennon, Leonardo Da Vinci, Ozzy Osborne, Danny Glover, Galileo Galilei (mathematician, scientist,physicist, astronomer), Patrick Dempsey, Pres. Woodrow Wilson, Pablo Picasso, Harry Belafonte, Octavia Spencer, General George Patton, Jules Verne, Alexander Graham Bell, Astronaut Peter Conrad, Neil Smith (footballer), Mark Schlereth (footballer), Frank Gore (footballer), Jeremy Bondsman (baseball),
Famous people with dyspraxia: Daniel Radcliffe, Albert Einstein, Richard Branson
Famous people with dysgraphia: Agatha Christie, Albert Einstein, George Patton, Henry Winkler, Thomas Edison
#Overcomers
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