This is the time of year when complete strangers may ask you if you are "ready for Christmas". Or they do the mental math to let you know "how many days you have left". Friends and workplaces have Christmas parties. Churches invite us to come and hear the children sing. Many of us postpone non-Christmas activities until "after the holidays". Everywhere we turn we are invited to have a better celebration if we would only just buy something.
Buy something? Isn't it more like buy everything? The other day I listened to a local radio station for 70 minutes. After every third Christmas carol there were four minutes of commercials, each geared toward a consumer purchase.
One ad offered a toll free number your kids can call to tell Santa what they want, then played an actual recording. Here's what the kid said to Santa: "I want a computer and a dog." Nothing like putting on the pressure. What if the family is not up for the work a new pet takes? Even the cheapest computers are still several hundred dollars. That kid has expensive wants and might get disappointed when he sees what Santa was able to do.
I wrinkled my nose when the announcer described this opportunity for your kids to "tell Santa what they want". No mention of gratitude, giving or celebration. Just go tell him what you want! And then some parent actually had little Jim call the number! Seriously? And the kid didn't even say please or use proper phone ediquette. Wait - maybe he hasn't been taught that yet. But he sure knows how to TELL what he wants.
Why would you want your kid to know how to ask for stuff before learning how to be polite to others? Some parent out there was just following the Christmas Crowd. You know, the ones who do it "because" without thinking it through. Christmas is about presents, so let's do that right. Get a lot of stuff for your kids so they have things to open. It will make them happy. Let's go see (or call) Santa to give him the list of wants. Yes, go sit on a stranger's lap (that's completely normal, no?) and lie and say you were good this year so you can get that pony. Teach kids that they "get" when they are "good". Don't "be good" for free! Only get the things on the list because any variance will disappoint. Be sure the other gift-givers follow the list, too. Don't mess this up.
Perhaps filling all the list items for every relative, friend and mailman is what people are referring to when they groan and say they are not ready? They have stores to visit and gifts to wrap. I heard not one but two car commercials (two different companies) telling me to really make their Christmas with new wheels. Snap. Why not?
The commercialism I saw as a little girl was gentle compared to the in-your-face commercialism on steroids of today. I usually only listen to internet radio so I'm spared from the insipid local ads telling me to order that Christmas fruit or tickets. By the end of the 70 minutes, I wanted to go home and take down the tree we are still putting up. Enough with the dangling of a new something with the false promise that it will make me happy. I work with some people who subsist on government assistance in order to sometimes have cheese on the table. What do these ads do to them? It discourages the parent who can't afford a single gift but the kid's eyes light up with hope when they see or hear a commercial. "Could I have one?" they ask. Mom shakes her head sadly, no.
My biggest problem with all the ads is that each item - whether a book or a car - is touted as "only" costing this much. Even if it was "only $19.99", it would cost a lot more if you really did "buy one for all the people on your list". I don't like the lie that money is easy because shopping is easy. Who really has enough in the bank to buy all the stuff the marketers tell us we want? What is the message we're getting?
We go buy stuff we don't need with money we don't have. I frequently hear people tell me they will be paying for Christmas until May. Or they groan about how much they are spending on gifts. Why do that? Let's leave it in December. If you live in North America, I can tell you that you don't "need" any of the stuff being promoted. Those are wants. We need food and shelter. And we truly will suffer without that. But we don't need the latest smart phone.
The over-focus on wants is tearing into the character of entire generations. The majority of our kids have more toys than they can play with in a month - why add to the pile unless you are going to recycle? (I've heard of an online toy rental where a new box comes each time you return one - genius!) It's overwhelming. How about we teach our kids about giving instead? And not necessarily stuff - but a pie? A chore? A song? Draw a picture? And in the process, we can limit the gifts so that they can actually enjoy and appreciate a present.
It's never too late to reel it in. Just because you used to have a moving van pull up loaded with brightly wrapped packages doesn't mean that you must continue. And, you can ask doting grandparents to join you. I would also refrain from wrapping up the new comforter they neeed so that they can unwrap it. Teach them to be grateful for even one present and don't confuse them into thinking that they need volume in order to have "good" Christmas.
Lost in the blare of Christmas carols and rush to shop and decorate is the reason why we really celebrate. Be sure that Jesus' birthday is the biggest deal of all. Less truly is more.
Merry Christmas!
P.S. Our family is not doing any gifts this year and I couldn't be more excited. We will feast and be together. #bliss
#photo credit: Tuna Melts My Heart
