The World's Most Important Baby

Last week a baby boy with arguably the largest security team ever was born to Britain's Royal Couple. His birth, gender and name had been highly anticipated and diligently chronicled by the entire world. Imagine that? The entire world knows you are going to have a baby and has some level of interest!

This story is born out of the tragedy the young father suffered when his mother was killed before our eyes in a horrific car accident. His parents had divorced and had not even married out of love. 31 years later from the day that awkward young princess stood on the same hospital steps with her newborn son, this man stood lovingly with his arm tenderly guiding the wife he loved and his own new son. The facial expressions couldn't be more telling - or different. Things will be different this time. This child will still of course be in line to the throne, but his parents will be on the same page and he will be surrounded by their mutual love for one another in addition to their love for him.

Don't we like to hear stories where tragedy turns to triumph? This is such a story and it gives us hope as we watch this couple share their joy.

I think God lights off fireworks and holds parades for each newborn on earth - we just can't see it the way he does. Each new birth is the beginning of a new story in the lives of the people connected. It is fresh and pure and if need be, can be a break from the old. Each baby is the most important baby in the world, we just don't have the same jewels or palaces.

When we are blessed to influence a brand-new life, we can let go of old ghosts. How many people tell you something had been done way back to bitter old great grandma and they shrug? They think that is the way is has to be because that is the way it has always been. Ah, but we have the power with God's help to do something about that. I come from a long line of grudge-holders, but that stopped with me when I learned that it is God's job to handle that. Just because your entire family line has never played the piano doesn't mean you can't. We don't need to blame our circumstances or character on anything or anyone in the past.  We can move forward.

This royal baby reminds me of how eager we are to hear something positive and happy. But we can all have this thrill in our own lives, too. Just close your eyes and imagine the fountains and bugles God has set before you as he rejoices in you!

The Day That Changes Everything

Yesterday we got the wonderful news that our daughter's BFF from high school safely delivered her first baby - a beautiful, cuddly baby boy. She posted on FB that he looked just like his papa (he does) and that "mama is in loooooooove." I've been praying for them during the pregnancy and finding out that he's here on the outside got me eagerly thinking about her new life. At 4:11 a.m. yesterday, everything changed for her.

Today is the celebration of the day that changed everything for me. At 8:40 a.m. on June 3, 1985 my daughter was born. In just a few minutes (she came via C-section), I went from mother-to-be to mother. After finding out she had all her fingers and toes, I just lay there crying quietly in greatful awe. She had made me a mother. I was someone's mother! I had a baby - a baby!! A sense of wonder and peace washed over me. Joy unlike anything I had ever known encircled me and whispered to my heart. My dream had come true.

Her second morning, I held her gently close, nestled in my arms. I closed my eyes and breathed in her sweet scent. I remember trying to memorize every detail of that moment to cherish forever. I always wanted to feel that glow.

The firsts were all conducted in a haze of amazement. The first time I diapered her I was all thumbs. The first time I bathed her I needed two nurses to guide me. Pulling on her little onsie gently so I wouldn't hurt her little arms. The first time I buckled her in the carseat. Thankfully I wasn't driving because I just had to sit next to her and gaze upon this lovely little person. The first time I walked her from the car into the house. Slowly, slowly. One short step at a time. And the first time I tried to nurse her...wondering if things were even working. The first time I heard her voice and anxiously poked and checked to see what she needed. The first time she kept me up all night changing sheets and diapers over and over I was actually thrilled to be there with her. Washing all the sleepers she owned was my pleasure. My lack of confidence at all of the newness kept me in awe for a good couple of weeks.

I remember laying in bed looking out at the late spring sky become dawn and smiling that I had nothing more important to do than cuddle and care for the little girl in the next room. Each morning seemed a little brighter since she had made her entrance. Days passed simply and comfortably. (I later learned that we had what people call a "good baby" - she began sleeping through the night at 10 days.)

Quickly I learned was that I didn't do anything alone anymore. She was in her baby seat in the bathroom with me or across the room from me in the kitchen. She rode in the car with all of her accoutraments with me. There was no more running quickly anywhere. Pay at the pump was not an option, she was unbuckled and carried inside the gas station when I paid. I was not number one in any way any longer, I was delighted to find I was number "last". Everything about her was radiantly more important than anything about me. After her needs had been met, I could get that glass of water. It surprised me that I didn't mind the radical shift of my importance, it was a natural part of this new life.

I didn't know what the future would bring, I was just eager to experience it's majesty with her. Within weeks I was already packing away sleepers she had outgrown. Soon she was really smiling and cooing and kicking her feet in excitement. Slowly I moved from awkward moves to confident grasps of who she was and how to do things. The newness ebbed into a comfortable way of life. I was "getting it" and having the most fun I'd ever had. Every day I thanked God for allowing me the honor to be the mother of this very little one.

Now our dear family friend is going to go through her new changes as she experiences life afresh with her precious baby. Congratulations new mother, and Happy Birthday to my girl. It doesn't stop being wonderful. And it goes by all too fast.

All in a Baby's Day

This is an excerpt from an article I wrote when our son was six months old - born 10 years after his sister - and I was learning and re-learning newborn parenting skills. Laugh again with me...


5:00 a.m. After hearing the 'call of the wild' and responding with a fresh diaper and early morning feeing, parents fall back asleep.

6:30 a.m. Realize that Baby kicking is a call to arms, at least one parent rises and heads for the shower. The other one sips warm water from the glass next to the bed, consoling Baby.

6:45 a.m. Exit shower and attempt to convince Baby that this dripping being is still you just wet and wrapped in towels.

7:10 a.m. Attempt to dress in front of Baby. Stumble to his room and provide him with a new diaper. Realize too late that the wood blinds are being sprinkled and will require a special cleaning procedure.

7:12 - 7:19 a.m. Clean off the window, blinds, changing table and wall as Baby lays shrieking in his crib.

7:29 a.m. Attempt to hold a brief family devotion in the kitchen. Feel relieved that God deeply understands people.

7:45 a.m. Feed Baby breakfast. Watch him practice pull-up exercises on your forearm. Return Baby to his seat after each bite. Wipe off your face, arm, chest and Baby's tray.

8:00 a.m. Pour a glass of water as you attempt to clean up the kitchen. Nibble on a cold bagel as you empty the dishwasher.

8:45 a.m. Baby's floor time! Put toys in front of Baby to discover. Put toys back when you see he would rather reach for the threads on your old couch.

9:00 - 9:40 a.m. Attempt to convince Baby it is time for morning nap. Once he has cried himself into a sweat, carefully place him in the swing and attempt to finish wiping off kitchen counter and table.

9:50 - 11:00 a.m. Laundry time. So much crying occurs as you are swapping loads you drop clean, wet clothes on dirty laundry room floor and forget what you were doing. Accidentally spill entire box of detergent into washer while trying to tune out Baby's shrieks.

11:05 a.m. Pour a glass of water and take 2 sips.

11:17 a.m. Receive a phone call from a friend who wonders why you never call them anymore.

11:23 a.m. Baby lets you know it is time to be fed again while you are still on the phone. He keeps letting you know until he has finished feasting, you have hung up and given him his 'Bink'.

11:36 a.m. Carefully carry a full and tired Baby across his room. You are about to put him down in the lovely crib you just had to have that he rarely sleeps in. As you bend down, hear Baby belch. Notice he has burped all over your shirt.

11:38 a.m. While changing your shirt, Baby notices you are no longer there and begins to shriek. Proceed to shove your head in an armhole.

11:47 a.m. Give up trying to stay home with Baby. Drive all over town for several hours trying to lull him back to sleep. He only listens to jazz music cranked loud enough to drown out his voice. Pray for green lights because he snaps awake the instant the gas guzzling SUV stops moving.

1:45 p.m. Arrive home tired and out of gas. Leave Baby in carseat in car and tiptoe into the house. Pour a glass of water and flip through the mail, unable to concentrate. Begin to play phone messages from more people who wonder why they don't hear from you.

1:48 p.m. Baby wakes up commanding attention.

1:55 - 2:45 p.m. Repeat morning routine. Take five bites of a banana. Pour a glass of water. Place Baby in cradle (another item you had to have) and sit down.

2:45 p.m. Begin to doze off watching an old 'Andy Griffith' rerun. The phone rings, you startle and answer it. Someone is offering you a dry cleaning discount.

3:02 p.m. Baby is asleep. A miracle! Your eyes are heavy. The world is quiet... Suddenly you realize you drive carpool and must get to school to pick up your older child. Drive to school with cool jazz blaring. Ignore stares of other parents wondering why someone your age still listens to music so loudly. Since your rear windows are tinted, no one sees Baby thrashing in the back seat.

3:25 p.m. Take Big Sister and Un-napped Baby to grocery store, the place where you keep all your food. Wander aimlessly up and down aisles, wondering what to make for dinner. Rely on the wisdom of a 10-year-old. Buy an extra package of Parmesan cheese, just in case.

3:50 p.m. While in the check out lane, growl at the latest cover of People featuring another celebrity mom with a baby the same age as yours looking more fabulous than ever. Mutter complaints to God about why your workout of lifting a 15-lb. baby in an 8-lb. car seat all day is not toning your arms like the picture. What about not even sitting down?

4:19 p.m. Big sister changes Baby while you put away the groceries and pour a glass of water. Wonder why you now have five packages of Parmesan cheese, Oreos and Popsicles but nothing for dinner.

4:30 p.m. Sister saunters into room. "Oh Mom, I forgot to tell you that something is wrong with my toilet and I need black shoes for my class play tomorrow."

4:48 p.m. Baby must eat right now. Feed him in ten minutes and clean up for twenty.

5:20 p.m. Ask Sister to mind Baby while you go upstairs to the bathroom. Hear Baby's screams reverberating through the floor. Rush downstairs without zipping jeans to find Sister blowing into Baby's face like a window fan - her technique to quiet him. Carry red-faced, sobbing Baby to safety and pour yourself a glass of water.

5:30 p.m. Call your husband on his cell and find out he is on his way home from work. Wait for him at the end of the driveway.

6:20 p.m. Remember the glass of water in the kitchen and discover it is warm.

6:30 p.m. Remember the laundry you left in the washer all day. Throw it it in the dryer. Even your new top with Big Sister's clothes. Later on, discover how many pieces of gum she had in her pocket.

7:05 p.m. Run over to Wal-Mart for the shoes and some Tylenol.

7:40 p.m. Somehow cook a family dinner. Baby notices everyone focused on their food and demands to be fed. Nurse Baby while eating. Watch in dismay as he yanks your placement out from underneath your plate of spaghetti.

8:20 p.m. The family takes Baby for a short walk. It takes 15 minutes to locate shoes, keys and the dog's leash.

9:00 p.m. After the walk, your Hubby tells you to take some time for yourself while he puts the kids to bed. Tip-toe upstairs to put away laundry. Find a warm glass of water on the bathroom counter.

9:07 p.m. You miss Baby on your hip and Sister chatting away. Tip-toe downstairs to peek. Hubby smiles and shakes his head at you.

9:11 p.m. While in Baby's room laying out his outfit for tomorrow, notice a warm glass of water on his upper closet shelf.

9:12 - 10:15 p.m. Big Sis goes back to bed. And back to bed. And back to bed.

10:20 p.m. Time for Baby's last feeding of the day. Throw on an old T-shirt and cuddle with him.

10:35 p.m. Sister is asleep. Baby is asleep. The dog is in her crate and the dishwasher is on. You hurry to fall asleep before someone needs you again. You've never been more tired or felt more complete.

10:37 p.m. Kiss Hubby good nite. Fall asleep thanking God for this ever-changing and wonderful season of nurturing your precious children - His gifts. Smile. Take a deep breath. While snuggling into your pillow, tell yourself you really must remember to wash your sheets tomorrow.

Parental Glue

As a self-recognized late bloomer, I am just now watching the Liam Neeson 2008 movie "Taken". In summary, it's about a dad who goes to every possible length to rescue his twitty 18 year old daughter who just went to Paris and naively got involved with sex slavery due to poor decisions. Punch, punch, gun shot yes! I would do anything to rescue my kids from danger and bring them home just like Liam. Passionate.

My very first experience in being a passionate parent was with with my baby girl. This story now not only makes me laugh at myself, everyone I tell it to laughs. But it serves a point that parents need to take a stance and act.

Just because I glued story book pages together if I didn't like where it was going, used liquid White-Out to erase words I thought my baby girl didn't need to learn and replaced them with less criminal words in matching font doesn't mean I am anal! I remember being mortified that my then two-year old could have a book where the word "stupid" was used and replaced it with "silly".

I literally read everything, saw everything and did everything before exposing my daughter to the subject. That way, I was able to provide commentary and ask questions, or in the case of my story book-itis, remove 'objectionable content.' I was like the mama bird who eats the food first and then feeds her babies.

You know what? As I grew in relationship with God and in parenting confidence, I loosened up with my anxiousness. All I was trying to do was celebrate my child and do the absolute best in providing her with the best foundation possible. It took a few years, but thanks to some gentle neighbors, I realized I had gone a tad overboard.

The cool family next door with three young sons were so calm and non-judgmental with all the things I had yet to learn. At that time we lived on a cul-de-sac with just seven homes. I was plotting out how many steps my girl could take in our yard while all the other kids romped up and down the street. The cool dad smiled at me and said, "She's just gonna be two houses away, it's okay." Reality hit!

Since then, I have relaxed so much that I only glue pages every other year. LOL. I'm actually so much more confident and relaxed that my daughter has been amazed at what I let slide with her little brother. We do not need to appear so uptight that our kids do not feel comfortable sharing. And, if we have been so uptight, it is hilarious to share and continue the conversation.

Our kids are growing, and we are, too. It's called a journey and a healthy balance. I love it all!