A few weeks ago I was on a long drive home and listening to Dr. Laura, my favorite radio shrink. I like to listen to the caller and prescribe advice and see if I match the good doctor. That day I was right and she was partially right.
Dr. Laura asked the listeners to answer this question: "What is the most important thing contributing to a child's life?" Her answer: An in tact family that eats dinner together. My answer: A family that bases their life on God AND spends time together.
Dr. Laura nails it when she prescribes time around the table sharing a meal and having natural conversations. Connecting as a family after spending time apart, fueling our bodies and being affirmed that we matter is bonding. However, if that is all we do to bond, we are missing the foundation. Don't we want our children to know
why we care to be together? Why family is important? Why we desire a certain outcome for their lives?
The dinner table is but a means to invest in our family. There are many methods, but only one main reason. That reason is to ensure our children know who God is and that God has provided a purpose for their lives beyond themselves. If we merely focus on ego-building dinners, our kids will get the mistaken idea that they are the stars of their lives. If we add more than esteem and expose them to God's Word and fun ways to understand him, we will launch well-grounded young adults who will see beyond themselves. That's been my goal as a parent.
What are some ways besides dinner to bond and coach our kids on a faith journey? There are great videos out there that dramatize stories from the Bible that can be played in clips and used as discussion-launchers. A new series that is one of the best I've seen is The Bible, produced by Mark Burnett and Roma Downy. Kids 5 and up can see this in small doses. Another thing to do is to attend dramas or presentations targeting children and bringing Bible teaching to them. One of my favorites is one a colleague of mine presents on the Seder. You could even reenact stories as a family. There are also Bible story books and CDs designed to tell God's story in contemporary language you could listen to or read as a family. Not only that, check out some family Bible trivia games. Volunteering as a family is a huge way for kids to experience personal contributions to others.
Something we do as a part of daily life is to observe what is happening in nature and our community and link it back to God. We also pray for situations we hear and see in the media. I have taught my kids that when we pray for the ambulance we hear, we may be the only person praying for that situation. Several years ago after praying for the sirens near my house, I later learned that one of my best friends had been in a near fatal car accident.
The main thing is to tailor your coaching to your family's style and the personalities and ages of your kids. Keep it fresh, keep it short, keep it constant. Your family is the only team your child will always belong to and loved unconditionally. Celebrate this daily!
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